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The Julian News
Julian , California
November 21, 2018     The Julian News
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November 21, 2018

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November 21, 2018 The Julian News 5 My Thoughts by Michele Harvey Health & Personal Services General Dentistry & Orthodontics “Dr. Bob” Goldenberg, DDS 2602 Washington St • 760 765 1675 Specializing in fixing broken teeth and beautifying your smile ! It’s time you had the smile you’ve always dreamed of ! Call today ! Most Insurance Plans Accepted Visa and Master Card WHAT A CHILD LEARNS ABOUT VIOLENCE A CHILD LEARNS FOR LIFE. Teach carefully. We can show you how. Call 877-ACT-WISE for a free brochure or visit www.actagainstviolence.org. NOTE TO PUB: DO NOT PRINT INFO BELOW, FOR I.D. ONLY. NO ALTERING OF AD COUNCIL PSAS. Act Against Violence - Magazine & Newspaper (2 1/1 6 x 2) B&W APARD2-N-05130-D “What a Child Learns” Line Work Film at Horan Imaging 212-689-8585 Reference #: 127093 CLNTS 1 WV B/W DOLEV 127093 *127093* 1/15/02 22:03 EAST OF PINE HILLS by Kiki Skagen Munshi Julian Medical Clinic A Division of Monday–Friday 8-4 pm 760-765-1223 • Complete Family Practice Services • Monthly OB/GYN • Digital X-ray Lab Services • Daily Borrego Pharmacy Delivery • Behavioral Health (Smart Care) Now accepting: Covered California, Medi-Cal, Medicare, Community Health Group, Molina, Sharp Commercial, CHDP. Most PPO’s and Tricare. Sliding Fee Scale and Financial Assistance Available. Blake A. Wylie, DO Unneetha Pruitt WHNP , Women’s Health Cathleen Shaffer, Nurse Practitioner Randy Fedorchuk MD, Pain Management WWW.AFTERSCHOOLNOW.ORG 1-866-KIDS-TODAY AFTERSCHOOL PROGRAMS. Ignore them and they’ll go away. NOTE TO PUB: DO NOT PRINT INFO BELOW, FOR I.D. ONLY NO ALTERING OF AD COUNCIL PSAS. Afterschool Alliance - Newspaper 2 1/16 x 2 B&W MFNYR2-N-06232-H “Ignore Them” 85 line screen Film at Schawk 212-689-8585 Reference #: 127931 - 4 AB 85 IRIS 127931 9/6/02 21:50 June 05, 2016 2:50pm All soldiers fight, suffer and die alone surrounded by friends... Pure allure... obscure to procure... and when achieved a voice asks, “Have you lived long enough? Do you want to go back” ... Happy 4th H Exclusivly 50 Years ago the Journey began for a young man from Del Mar. Drafted and shipped off to the other side of the world. Local Resident Howard Fisher tells his story of war and survival and recovery. Landscaping In Limited Space Flu shots available at the Julian Clinic every day from 9-11 and 1-3. Appointment advised. Please call the clinic 760-765-1223 for information. Most of Japan’s people are crowded into the few flat (or flattish) areas in these mountainous islands leaving more than a bit of contradiction in the landscape. Large areas, mostly vertical, are underpopulated and becoming more so as villagers move to the cities; the cities are intensely crowded. Tokyo is a vast landscape of high buildings; outlying towns like Nara have a more human scale but structures are still cheek by jowl. Perhaps because there is so little space that isn’t the foundation for some structure or asphalt for roads and sidewalks, houses don’t exactly have front yards. Or back yards. Or much of any yard but… there are gardens. Impossibly small areas, beautifully landscaped with a lovely tree, perhaps a bush, all neatly trimmed and carefully arranged to provide a tiny spot of beauty set against this wall and crowded by that sidewalk. Larger gardens surround temples and parks and are similarly cared for. Every twist of a little path opens up a new vista, a stone bridge over a little pond seen through a pine tree, a small grove of bamboo among moss covered stones, maple leaves patterned against a temple. Trees are pruned over the years, some branches propped up with lovely sticks, grown to frame yet another tiny vista, giving the illusion of space and the reality of beauty. It is inspiring. The fruit trees in Julian need pruning… could they ever look like Japanese fruit trees? It will take some contemplation and more time. Maybe… just maybe… But probably not. Antique Post Cards from Kathy Feigal The Julian Pioneer Museum is showcasing a very special Christmas Tree this year starting on Friday, November 23rd. ,The tree will be adorned with over 150 antique post cards and decorated with candles set in antique clip-on holders. A few red bows will add a bright accent to the six and a half foot tree. Come and enjoy reading the greetings and postmarks on these old cards. The museum is open every Thursday through Sunday from 10am to 4pm. The tree will be on display through January 6, 2019. A donation of $3.00 per person will be greatly appreciated. This is a reprint of a column originally published in November 2013 Embarrassing People, Not Good I know a couple who get along really well most of the time. Occasionally though, I just want to slap the man with words, telling him that he is embarrassing his wife and making a fool of himself at the same time. She once said something seriously in both words and tone. He chuckled while saying, “Honey, you know that isn’t true.” In saying that, he contradicted her in public and made her feel stupid. Actually he was the one who was incorrect and he was wrong to treat her as if she hadn’t said something worth hearing. Women often tell the world about their husband’s failures. I think they should think before talking. Many people drink too much. They drink enough to loosen their tongues and they end up saying things that totally embarrass them later. Embarrassing people in public is just wrong. Even if you are the only person you embarrass; It’s not necessary and it makes you look bad if you are the person doing it. I know two siblings who love to get every chance they can to embarrass each other. One will bring up something that happened 40 or 50 years ago as if it happened yesterday. Maybe one will talk about a chore that was never completed saying, “All I know is that when we were kids and it was your week to wash dishes, we ate from paper plates.” Is it really necessary to bring things like that up? My Grandmother would have said that person was showing the family’s dirty laundry in public. I get tired of listening to both of them and through the years have found many reasons not to spend time with either of them. Volunteering runs in my family. For many generations, people in my family have volunteered their time helping others. Many families have histories of helping others. Volunteers don’t get paid a salary for their work, so we all assume that volunteers work for the love of helping others. Most volunteers do, but every once in a while I end up working with a person who wants all the people around them to treat them as a special person because they have dedicated so much time to help other people. These people don’t seem to realize that they are part of a group of dedicated people and it can be very embarrassing to work with them, knowing that others may think all volunteers are like that one person. I’ve worked with people who aren’t good at explaining what needs to be done, and then yelling or scolding the people who work for them for not doing the job properly. These things don’t ever need to be done publicly. I think some bosses feel important if lots of people see them acting bossy. I’m not impressed with bossy people. I’ve worked for lots of people and I’ve had lots of people work for me. Whether or not the employees are paid or volunteering, it is embarrassing for them to be scolded in front of others and those scenes make the boss look asinine. While talking with some friends about embarrassing things that happen, we talked about people who should probably be embarrassed, but aren’t. When a person tells a really bad joke or story about someone else, and no one laughs, it could be that the joke wasn’t actually funny. Instead, it may have been an embarrassment. I really hate times when adults hurt the feelings of children. Sometimes they don’t do it on purpose, but mostly they do it without thinking. We should never interact with children without using our brains. One time a man, a friend of our family, told my son that one winter, years ago, the ice was so thick on Cuyamaca Lake, a jeep was driven on the ice without sinking. Assuming the story was true; my son repeated it to a different man. That man really didn’t know if the story was true, but he humiliated my son in front of a lot of his friends, telling him he must have made up the story because it couldn’t possibly be true. Though he didn’t live here during that really harsh winter, and he didn’t listen to stories of our area’s history, he said a jeep could never drive on Cuyamaca Lake. I was there when my son heard the story. That day no one questioned it. When he repeated it, instead of humiliating a child, the second man could have said something kind, or maybe even admitted that he didn’t know if it was possible. Over 20 years ago I lost respect for that second man. His actions since then have never given me reason to change my mind. I like to think that I’m a good person because I work at being kind to people. Sometimes it’s easy to say something before our brains have time to tell us to hold back. However, I try to put my brain in gear long before words come from my mouth. I know that sometimes I say or write things that anger people. But I try very hard not to embarrass people. To paraphrase the Golden Rule, I don’t embarrass people and I don’t see any reason for them to embarrass me, or to embarrass anyone else. I learned many years ago that if I talk too spontaneously, too quickly, I can manage to say things that embarrass me for having said them or my words embarrass someone else, which is unnecessary and even worse than embarrassing myself. I learned a long time ago that if I don’t say anything, I keep my dignity much longer than I would if I say something I later regret. We can all take a deep breath before opening our mouths to talk. It works for me, so I’ll keep breathing. These are my thoughts. * * * If you live close to an International Rescue Committee office in the United States, find out how you can assist a refugee family as they transition to American life. Invite a newly arrived family to your home for a welcoming meal. Listen to their hopes and dreams, and share your own. — Mandy Patinkin * * *